You'll Be the Death of Me - Karen M. McManus

Initial draw: ✰✰✰✰✰
Character development: ✰✰✰✰✰
Plot/Writing style: ✰✰✰✰✰
My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

From the cover:

Type A Ivy lost a student council election to the class clown, and now she has to face the school, humiliated. Heartthrob Mateo is burned out--he's been working two jobs since his family's business failed. And outsider Cal just got stood up . . . again.

Ivy, Mateo, and Cal used to be close. Now all they have in common is Carlton High and the beginning of a very bad day.

So when Cal pulls into campus late for class and runs into Ivy and Mateo, it seems like the perfect opportunity to turn a bad day around. They'll ditch and go into the city. Just the three of them, like old times. Except they've barely left the parking lot before they run out of things to say . . .

. . . until they spot another Carlton High student skipping school--and follow him to the scene of his own murder. In one chance move, their day turns from dull to deadly. And it's about to get worse.

It turns out Ivy, Mateo, and Cal still have some things in common. They all have a connection to the dead kid. And they're all hiding something.

Now they're all wondering--could it be that their chance reconnection wasn't by chance after all?

Look...in the interest of full disclosure, I'm not sure Karen M. McManus could write something that I wouldn't like. She's just...so good. Even if this wasn't her book, though, the premise really appealed to me. Friends who began to grow apart as they moved from elementary to middle school until ultimately they started traveling in different circles? Who hasn't lived that? I can certainly think of some friends from my earlier school days who, if presented with a chance in high school to spend a nostalgic day with, I would have leapt at the chance. And how could Ivy, Mateo, and Cal have predicted that this chance to recreate their "best day ever" would turn out to be a nightmare instead? 

The twists and turns as the trio moved through their day kept me on the edge of my seat, and there were some delightful surprise moments from some of the side characters that delighted me as well. This was not a book I wanted to put down, and I'm already looking forward to reading it again when it comes out!

Concrete Rose - Angie Thomas

My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

From the cover:

"If there's one thing seventeen-year-old Maverick Carter knows, it's that a real man takes care of his family. As the son of a former gang legend, Mav does that the only way he knows how: dealing for the King Lords. With this money he can help his mom, who works two jobs while his dad's in prison. Life's not perfect, but with a fly girlfriend and a cousin who always has his back, Mav's got everything under control.

Until, that is, Maverick finds out he's a father.

Suddenly he has a baby, Seven, who depends on him for everything. But it's not so easy to sling dope, finish school, and raise a child. So when he's offered the chance to go straight, he takes it. In a world where he's expected to amount to nothing, maybe Mav can prove he's different.

When King Lord blood runs through your veins, though, you can't just walk away. Loyalty, revenge, and responsibility threaten to tear Mav apart, especially after the brutal murder of a loved one. He'll have to figure out for himself what it really means to be a man."

I would give this a thousand stars if I could. Even just typing this description after finishing reading it, I'm tearing up a little. This is a book that will stick with you. I haven't been able to stop thinking about Maverick and his experiences since I finished reading it. Angie Thomas, you've done it again. 

You do not have to have read The Hate U Give to read this, but having read both, one of the things I appreciate about this book existing is that while so often in YA you get the teenager's perspective and see very little of the parents, this gives us a look into Maverick's experience as a teenager and helps us understand his background and where he's coming from as a parent in The Hate U Give. It made me appreciate Maverick even more. (And appreciate Lisa even more, which...I already loved her, but god damn. She's incredible.)

Something else that really stood out to me was the role that Mr. Wyatt played in Maverick's life. The characters in this book may be fictional, but there are Mavericks all over the place in the US, and we all hear people folx in situations like his as though they aren't even human and don't deserve basic decency. I've done a lot of research and training about Adverse Childhood Experiences and how trauma can impact kids' lives as they grow through adulthood, and reading this was a kick in the gut thinking about how many children grow up being fed the same messages that Maverick is, basically telling them not even to try because they're worthless and no matter what they do they won't ever amount to anything. But watching Maverick interact with Mr. Wyatt also reminded me of the studies that show how much of a positive impact having just one adult outside of their family circle who believes in them and who they can trust can have on kids in traumatic situations. Mr. Wyatt is that person for Maverick. We need to be those people for the kids in our lives.

Anyway...sorry, this really isn't so much a book review as it is me getting teary eyed thinking about how important trauma-informed practices are and how all kids deserve to be loved and believed in. Just trust, this book is incredible. Read it and sit with it awhile. 

(And also, always wear a condom. Maybe two, just in case. 😉)

Alex, Approximately - Jenn Bennett

 My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

From the cover:

"Classic movie fan Bailey "Mink" Rydell has spent months crushing on a witty film geek she only knows online as Alex. Two coasts separate the teens until Bailey moves in with her dad, who lives in the same California surfing town as her online crush. Faced with doubts (what if he's a creep in real life - or worse?), Baily doesn't tell Alex she's moved to his hometown. Or that she's landed a job at the local tourist-trap museum. Or that she's being heckled daily by the irritatingly hot museum security guard, Porter Roth - a.k.a.  her new arch nemesis. 

But life is a whole lot messier than in the movies, especially when Bailey discovers those tricky fine lines dividing hate, love, and whatever it is she's starting to feel for Porter. And as the summer months go by, Bailey must choose whether to cling to a dreamy online fantasy in Alex or take a risk on an imperfect reality with Porter. The choice is both simpler and more complicated than she realizes, because Porter Roth is hiding a secret of his own: Porter is Alex...Approximately."

Our story starts off with an online exchange between Alex and Mink where Alex invites Mink to fly out to California over the summer and join him for his town's annual film festival. Mink brushes it off and jokes about considering, but all the while, in the wake of her mom's bitter divorce from her stepdad, she is actually moving to that very town to live with her dad, a sci-fi loving accountant who I could not possibly adore more. As noted in the summary, Mink, better known by most as Bailey, is reluctant to tell Alex that she is coming because regardless of how well they get along, she has no way of knowing whether he is who he says he is, and after a bad experience several years ago, she is cautious about who she trusts and what information she shares with strangers. (Good call, Mink! Always better to be safe than sorry.)

So...Bailey arrives in sunny Coronado Cove and promptly begins her search for Alex, relying on the few clues she has to where she might find him. Her search time, unfortunately, is limited by her summer job at The Cavern Palace, a museum better known by locals as "The Cave." Her first day comes with highs and lows - high, she meets gregarious, foul-mouthed Grace Achebe, and the two become fast friends; low, she has her second run-in with Porter Roth, grandson of local surfing legend Pennywise Roth, and as far as Bailey can tell, a complete and utter douchebag. The two butt heads immediately, and Bailey is certain working with him will make her time at The Cave unbearable. But the more time they spend together, the more Bailey realizes that there's an odd sort of compatibility to their bickering. And that she might actually look forward to their regular sparring sessions.

As Bailey and Porter start spending more time together, her search for Alex shifts to the back burner. At first she feels guilty, but he's pretty much ghosted her right back, so does it even matter that she never told him she was coming to California? After all, she and Alex got along online, sure, but an anonymous internet friendship can't compete with what she feels for Porter in real life. Can't get too comfortable, though, because of course things can't stay perfect for long...

Ultimately, this is one of those books where you know from the first page that things are going to end up all right and you're totally fine with that. It's a light read, a happy ending, and the type of feel-good story that many of us need right now. Bonus, it's super quick, so if you've been in a reading slump (like I may have been this week), it's a good one to dive into and shake the reading doldrums off. Read and be happy, my friends. (Also, bonus points for excellent modeling of what consent should look like!)

Invisible Monsters - Chuck Palahniuk

My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

"She's a catwalk model who has everything: a boyfriend, a career, a loyal best friend. But when a sudden motor 'accident' leaves her disfigured and incapable of speech, she goes from being the beautiful centre of attention to being an invisible monster, so hideous that no one will acknowledge she exists.

Enter Brandy Alexander, Queen Supreme, one operation away from being a real woman, who will teach her that reinventing yourself means erasing your past and making up something better, and that salvation hides in the last place you'll ever want to look.

The narrator must exact revenge upon Evie, her best friend and fellow model; kidnap Manus, her two-timing ex-boyfriend; and hit the road with Brandy in search of a brand-new past, present and future."

WHEW, y'all, this book is a RIDE. There are two options for reading, the originally published version or the remix, which is the way Palahniuk wanted to publish it. The remix bounces around, having you turn to different chapters rather than reading linearly, and I loved it. Usually when I read, I get a mix of excitement and almost apprehension as I see the pages in the back of the book dwindling, because I can't wait to find out what happens, but also noooo, it's almost over! With the structure of this book, there was none of that. You're bouncing back and forth, all over the place, so there's no visual progress marker. I didn't expect that to have such an impact on my reading experience, but it did! Fascinating, the way brains work.

As far as the content of the book...man, I don't even know how to talk about it. It's so weird, and there are endless twists and turns. Every chapter has some kind of reveal, and the reader gets enough bits and pieces of backstory that they start to feel like they're figuring things out, and then BAM! Something else pops up that blows your mind. This is not my typical read, and honestly based on my previous experience with Palahniuk I did not go into it with high hopes or an open mind - I fully expected to slog through it and be like "meh, that was ok." Instead, I couldn't put it down. Such a strange, fantastic read.

The Day Tajon Got Shot - Beacon House

My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

From the cover:

"Meet Tajon.

Tajon is sixteen and black.
He's tall and skinny, and he wears his hair in dreads.
Tajon works hard and tries his best to be good.
He does OK in school. He has plans.
He's determined.

Tajon is the kind of son who cares about his family.
He's the kind of brother who stands up for his sister.
He's the kind of kid who dreams big dreams to get himself and
those he loves up and out of the hood.

Tajon is the one who gets shot.

Meet the authors.
Ten black teen girls in Washington, DC started writing this book during the rise of the Black Lives Matter movement. They began with one central question: What really happens in a community when a black youth is the victim of violence by police? Each writer takes on the perspective of a central character - the victim, the police officer, the witness, the parent, the friend - and examines how it feels to be a human being on all sides of this event. Their stories thoughtfully explore issues of race, violence, loyalty, and justice in a community torn apart but seeking connection."

This book is important, and not just because of the topic. Books like The Hate U Give, All American Boys, How It Went Down, etc. are all valuable, and if you have the time and inclination I recommend reading all of them. Before you do, though, I suggest you get your hands on a copy of this book--legit, ask me, I will lend you mine.

Why should this be number one on your to read list? First things first, because it was written by a group of teenage girls. If that knowledge doesn't hit you like a punch in the gut with every word you read, then you just might be missing a heart. Think about what they must be going through to be able to produce something like this. These girls worked together to examine all sides of the epidemic of police violence toward black people in a thoughtful, emotional, and powerful way, and I was blown away with every page. As if that's not enough, they brought each character to life, and I caught myself holding my breath multiple times as I read. Finally, the artwork incorporated into the story added even more depth. This book is a work of art. And page 151, man...I don't think I've ever reacted so strongly to a book before. 

Final reason to read this? Jason freaking Reynolds tweeted that people needed to read it. Jason Reynolds, guys. If you don't want to take my word for it, take his. I promise you, he's right.

Solo - Kwame Alexander

My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

From the cover:

"When the heart gets lost, let the music find you.

Blade never asked for a life of the rich and famous. In fact, he’d give anything not to be the son of Rutherford Morrison, a washed-up rock star and drug addict with delusions of a comeback. Or to no longer be part of a family known most for lost potential, failure, and tragedy. The one true light is his girlfriend, Chapel, but her parents have forbidden their relationship, assuming—like many—that Blade will become just like his father.

In reality, the only thing Blade has in common with Rutherford is the music that lives inside them. But not even the songs that flow through Blade’s soul are enough when he’s faced with two unimaginable realities: the threat of losing Chapel forever, and the revelation of a long-held family secret, one that leaves him questioning everything he thought was true. All that remains is a letter and a ticket to Ghana—both of which could bring Blade the freedom and love he’s been searching for, or leave him feeling even more adrift."

Incredibly short review alert! 

I loved the incorporation of his songs into the audiobook, that was a fantastic addition. I also enjoyed the message that it's about the journey, not about the destination. I docked a star because the transitions were a little jarring at times and parts of the story progressed in fast forward--I would have liked more detail. That aside, though, this was a fantastic book. Enjoy the journey.

American Street - Ibi Zoboi

My rating: ⭐⭐⭐

From the cover:

"The rock in the water does not know the pain of the rock in the sun.

On the corner of American Street and Joy Road, Fabiola Toussaint thought she would finally find une belle vie—a good life.

But after they leave Port-au-Prince, Haiti, Fabiola’s mother is detained by U.S. immigration, leaving Fabiola to navigate her loud American cousins, Chantal, Donna, and Princess; the grittiness of Detroit’s west side; a new school; and a surprising romance, all on her own.

Just as she finds her footing in this strange new world, a dangerous proposition presents itself, and Fabiola soon realizes that freedom comes at a cost. Trapped at the crossroads of an impossible choice,  will she pay the price for the American dream?"

Fabiola came to the United States with her mother from Haiti, planning to move to Detroit and live with her aunt and cousins. When they arrive in the United States, however, Fabiola's mother is detained by immigration, and Fabiola is forced to continue on to Detroit alone. Once there, she pushes tirelessly to find a way to free her mother, even as she adjusts to life in the United States, making friends and even getting a boyfriend. Sadly, however comfortable she may start to feel, Detroit is different from Haiti in ways she couldn't expect, and there are things about her new life she couldn't possibly understand. When Fabiola gets in over her head in her quest to get her mother to Detroit, will she be able to find her footing and make things right? Or will her new life be forever altered?

I've been putting off writing this review for a long time because while there were things I really enjoyed about the book, it also had some pretty big flaws, and I wasn't sure what to say about it. The one big issue I struggled with was that it tried to do a lot and consequently lacked character and plot development and seemed to lose the thread of different storylines partway through, then pick back up later in ways that didn't quite connect to me. Possibly the biggest example of this, for me anyway, was Fab's relationship with her boyfriend...there just wasn't enough buildup to the relationship for any of the interactions between the two of them to hold any impact, and a lot of the tension in their relationship made no sense to me and seemed over-the-top as a result. I wish some of the branches in the plot had been pared down, because despite doing way too much, it was a good read, and the world needs more titles like this one. Ultimately, while this wasn't my favorite book, I did enjoy it, and I recommend picking it up if you're looking for something new to read. If you're an audiobook fan, the narrator did a fantastic job--it's definitely worth a listen.

The Hate U Give - Angie Thomas

My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

From the cover:

"Sixteen-year-old Starr Carter moves between two worlds: the poor neighborhood where she lives and the fancy suburban prep school she attends. The uneasy balance between these worlds is shattered when Starr witnesses the fatal shooting of her childhood best friend Khalil at the hands of a police officer. Khalil was unarmed.

Soon afterward, his death is a national headline. Some are calling him a thug, maybe even a drug dealer and a gangbanger. Protesters are taking to the streets in Khalil's name. Some cops and the local drug lord try to intimidate Starr and her family. What everyone wants to know is: what really went down that night? And the only person alive who can answer that is Starr.

But what Starr does or does not say could upend her community. It could also endanger her life. "

Everyone should read this book. It might as well be non-fiction...it sure as hell felt like non-fiction. I don't live in Starr's world, and THUG is such an eye-opening glimpse into how differently kids in her situation grow up compared to how I did. I get nervous when there's a cop behind me in traffic because getting a ticket would be inconvenient. Kids like Starr grow up being taught how to behave with police officers to hopefully, fingers crossed, if everything goes well, not end up beaten or dead. 

Let that sink in, man.

Kids in Starr's situation are growing up legitimately afraid for their lives. Jesus Christ. 

Read this book. Then give it to a friend and get them to read it.

When I Cast Your Shadow - Sarah Porter

My rating: ⭐⭐

From the cover:

"Dashiell Bohnacker was hell on his family while he was alive. But it’s even worse now that he’s dead…

Ruby. Haunted by her dead brother, unable to let him go, Ruby must figure out whether his nightly appearances in her dreams are the answer to her prayers—or a nightmare come true…

Everett. He’s always been jealous of his dashing older brother. Now Everett must do everything he can to save his twin sister Ruby from Dashiell’s clutches.

Dashiell. Charming, handsome, and manipulative, Dash has run afoul of some very powerful forces in the Land of the Dead. His only bargaining chips are Ruby and Everett. At stake is the very survival of the Bohnacker family, bodies and souls…"

I was kind of on the fence about how to rate this because the genre isn't my favorite. I went back and forth for a bit because did I not like it because it simply wasn't my bag or did I not like it because it wasn't as good as other books? Ultimately, I have read other books in genres that I don't particularly love and enjoyed them, and more specifically I have read books of this genre that I didn't expect to enjoy and did...so I went with the two-star rating. This book had some promise, but I just couldn't get into it. 

My issues with the book. For starters, I am a huge baby when it comes to scary stuff, and this struck zero fear into my heart. It was obviously supposed to have some creep factor to it, but it did nothing for me, and I'm sorry but if it did nothing for me, the person who was terrified out of her mind by Signs, of all movies, then it wasn't scary. Second, the whole premise of what was going on was just so convoluted and weird that I couldn't get into it. Give me something to follow, man. Anything. Finally, there was way too much mention of how incredible and charming and wonderful Dashiell was and what podgy, lumpy, boring assholes Ruby and Ever were in comparison. Hard pass on reading a repeat of that every other chapter for an entire book. We get it. People thought Dashiell was hot and Ruby and Everett don't compare. Move on. 

I know I said finally, but just as a bonus--there was some really weird incestuous shit thrown in, which.......ew. Why? Not the best read ever.