Two Boys Kissing - David Levithan

My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

From the cover:

"New York Times  bestselling author David Levithan tells the based-on-true-events story of Harry and Craig, two 17-year-olds who are about to take part in a 32-hour marathon of kissing to set a new Guinness World Record—all of which is narrated by a Greek Chorus of the generation of gay men lost to AIDS. 

While the two increasingly dehydrated and sleep-deprived boys are locking lips, they become a focal point in the lives of other teen boys dealing with languishing long-term relationships, coming out, navigating gender identity, and falling deeper into the digital rabbit hole of gay hookup sites—all while the kissing former couple tries to figure out their own feelings for each other."

First off, David Levithan is an amazing narrator. I want him to read everything to me. Second, this book is not a light read, but my damn, it is amazing. The main narrative is about Harry and Craig as they try to break the Guinness World Record for longest kiss, but the story branches off to follow several other boys--Peter and Neil, a couple in a long-term relationship, Avery and Ryan, who meet at the start of the book, Cooper, who is only out online and struggling with his mental health, and finally Tariq, who early in the book is attacked on the street for being gay. Like I said...not a light read.

The narration by the "Greek Chorus" of gay men lost to AIDS took a bit for me to get used to, but after the first couple of chapters I was hooked. All the stories have their heartbreaking moments, but a few hit me particularly hard, like Avery and Ryan's experience at the abandoned mini-golf place, Neil's experience with coming out to his family, and basically everything about Cooper's story. Also, I've never kissed someone for 32 hours before (oof, no thank you), but Harry and Craig's experience was so descriptive that I felt what they felt. Reading about their aching backs, their thirst, their discomfort made me feel those things. And what I really felt was the support of their friends and family throughout the experience. When the theater group worked together to get more lights for the broadcast, when they formed a wall to protect the boys after someone drove by and egged Harry...seeing the way everyone pulled together to show their love for the two of them was beautiful. This book will make you feel everything. It's amazing. You should read it.

Every Heart a Doorway - Seanan McGuire

My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

From the cover:

"Eleanor West’s Home for Wayward Children
No Solicitations
No Visitors
No Quests

Children have always disappeared under the right conditions; slipping through the shadows under a bed or at the back of a wardrobe, tumbling down rabbit holes and into old wells, and emerging somewhere... else.

But magical lands have little need for used-up miracle children.

Nancy tumbled once, but now she’s back. The things she’s experienced... they change a person. The children under Miss West’s care understand all too well. And each of them is seeking a way back to their own fantasy world.

But Nancy’s arrival marks a change at the Home. There’s a darkness just around each corner, and when tragedy strikes, it’s up to Nancy and her new-found schoolmates to get to the heart of the matter.

No matter the cost."

It's hard to put a description of this book into words because it was so damn weird. In a good way, but still...weird. Nancy arrives at Eleanor West's Home for Wayward Children and is still struggling to navigate the school and the differences in all the magical worlds of her fellow students when "tragedy strikes" in the form of her roommate being murdered in the middle of the night, found the next morning with her hands cut off. (Yeah, that's right...that shit really snuck up on me. Warning for my fellow squeamy squeamish people out there.) Full of fear and suspicion, students begin turning against each other as things at the school go from bad to worse. Nancy and her new friends must stick together and weather the accusations of their classmates as they try to stay alive long enough to find out who is really at the bottom of the school's problems.

If I Was Your Girl - Meredith Russo

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Sometimes my favorite part about downloading audiobooks from Overdrive is that it's the only avenue where I truly browse and choose random books, rather than finding things on my to-read list. I choose a collection, filter for currently available audiobooks, and scroll until one jumps out at me. Happily, the title that recently jumped out at me was If I Was Your Girl by Meredith Russo.

From the front cover:

"Amanda Hardy is the new girl in school in Lambertville, Tennessee. Like any other girl, all she wants is to make friends and fit in. But Amanda is keeping a secret. There's a reason why she transferred schools for her senior year, and why she's determined not to get too close to anyone. And then she meets Grant Everett. Grant is unlike anyone she's ever met--open, honest, kind--and Amanda can't help but start to let him into her life. As they spend more time together, she finds herself yearning to share everything about herself...including her past. But she's terrified that once she tells Grant the truth, he won't be able to see past it. Because the secret that Amanda's been keeping? It's that she used to be Andrew."

To a point, Amanda's story is one that anyone can empathize with. High school sucks, and even if there aren't major things that set you apart from the crowd it can be hard to fit in. I think a lot of us, myself included, viewed high school as four years we had to survive before we got out into the "real" world. But I never had to worry that I literally would not survive high school.

It's easy to demonize or dismiss things you don't understand, and there are a lot of people who don't understand trans people. Amanda's story, while admittedly fiction and made simpler for story's sake, provides valuable insight into what it's like to grow up trans, to feel like something is wrong and not be entirely sure how to fix it...to finally find the solution only to discover that a huge number of people judge you, hate you, and sometimes even wish violence on you, because of that solution. It also does an incredible job of shining a light on the fact that a person's trans-ness is not and should never become the only thing that defines them. Amanda's journey is one, not just of a trans woman trying to find her place in the world, but also one of self-discovery that we should all identify with. I wish everyone would read this book.